Couples Counseling in Irmo

Does your relationship have these problems?

  • Small issue turns to a major argument
  • Feel ignored, unheard and frustrated
  • Feel judged, hurt or rejected
  • Arguments do not lead to solutions
  • Missing closeness and intimacy
  • Feel misunderstood and alone
  • Have trouble communicating with each other
  • Disagreements leave you feeling resentful
  • Disappointed the relationship is not what you expected

Relationships with our Partners

Our relationship with our spouse/partner is one of the closest relationships we will have in life.  The connection that bonds us together can be likened in depth and intensity to the parent-child bond as it is similarly built on safety, intimacy, affection, support and comfort.  No wonder it hurts so much when it is threatened with conflict.  Partners often respond differently to conflict. One may become closed off or withdrawn while the other anxiously attempts to talk the problem out.  These responses often become a pattern used to reduce tension and stabilize the relationship, however, it rarely works and tends to fuel conflict causing the relationship to become stuck.

couples counseling in irmo

When your relationship becomes stuck, you may have a hard time feeling close and enjoying your time with each other.  Many couples find themselves repeating the same arguments, but never coming to an understanding.  Sometimes disagreements spiral out of control and create new areas of conflict or wounds.  Feeling misunderstood, judged, criticized, unloved or cared for can cause the relationship to lose it’s spark and cause partners to become emotionally withdrawn from one another.

If this sounds familiar, you are not alone and there is good reason to hope.  With commitment and hard work, you and your partner can get back on track and rebuild a loving, close relationship.

Couples Counseling in Irmo

How couples counseling can help:

Many couples come into therapy because of problems with communication, not feeling heard or understood by one another.  What we know is that couples tend to develop a pattern of communication they use to discuss upsetting issues.  We will work to figure out the what the pattern is and dig deeper to understand the affect it has on each one of you.  You will learn to identify the pattern that is intensifying the conflict and be able to change it when it occurs.   You will learn how to express your feelings and needs without causing the other to become reactive or withdrawn.  The skills you develop will help you feel more secure and safe when discussing conflicts.  Together, you will identify what each other needs to feel important, loved and cared for so that you can have a strong, trusting connection that will naturally bring back the closeness you desire.

What if my partner will not come to our couples counseling session?

Often times, one partner will want to get help for the relationship by going into counseling while the other may say they ” are not interested in going” or “don’t believe in therapy”.  This can be very discouraging if you are the partner who wants help.  You may find it beneficial to go to individual therapy as working on yourself can drastically improve the relationship for both of you.  Changes you make within yourself can go a long way to improving things between you and may encourage your partner to join you in.

Therapist in Columbia, SC; Counselor in Columbia, SC;  Anxiety, Depression, Grief, Postpartum, Eating Disorders, Couples and Marriage Counseling in Columbia, Irmo, Chapin, and Lexington, SC.